Bella's Mess
by GoldMagic89 a.k.a Elmo
Summary: Bella has found her self in a confusing situation one one hand there is Edward her true love but also the person who left her, on the other hand there is Jacob, and what will happen when Bella discovers something that will make that choice harder.
1. Chapter 1

**Neither Twilight or an of the character's belong to me they all belong to Stephenie Mayer**

**Ok so here is chapter 1 of Bella's mess let me know what you think and any improvements that I can make would be useful thanks.**

Chapter 1

Edward has left me I must have done something wrong otherwise he would not have left me right?

But then what is it that I have done wrong I just can't think... If it had not been for Jacob then I don't think I could have got through these past couple of months. He's my best friend and has always been there for me the best he could. But still I can't just forget about Edward can I he has been my boyfriend and I love him, but I think I might be starting to fall for Jacob as well.

I still feel the same way about Edward and I don't love Jacob as much as I love Edward but I just keep wondering that if I followed my feelings towards Jacob whilst it is obvious that Edward is not coming back then why shouldn't I have a relationship with him. He has seen me at my worst.

Perhaps then he would start talking to me again. But then I would have to actually get to talk to him before I could show him how I really feel about him, but how?

I shook my head and suddenly realised that Charlie had been talking to me.

"Bella are you listening to me?" I shrugged my shoulders sheepishly at him and mumbled a sorry to him before he started again.

"I said why don't you call Jacob, surely he'll be at home by now, and you can't keep moping around here for the rest of your life."

"but what if he won't talk to me"

" I don't want you to go back to how you were when _he_ left the town, it was Jacob who brought you back to me and I am not going to let him take you away again."

I shrugged and headed towards the phone and dialled Jacobs's number. I was not expecting an answer or for Billy to answer the phone and give me some excuse why Jacob could not talk to me at that moment again. Instead I was surprised when it was Jacob himself who answered the phone. He sounded as if he had been laughing and there was a lot of shouting in the background telling me that he had company.

"Hello"

"Jacob please don't hang up please"

"Bells what's wrong" I realised that he must have picked up on the frantic pitch of my voice thinking that something was wrong he sounded worries. I took a couple of breaths to get myself and my emotions under control.

"I just really need to talk to you what have I done to upset you? Why do you keep avoiding me? And why does this keep happening to me "I asked him all at once not giving him the chance to tell me to leave him alone. The last question I said in barely a whisper that I thought Jacob would not be able to hear. It was more of a thought than a question that I had had whilst trying to get some answers out of Jacob otherwise I would not have said anything about it at all.

"Bells I'm sorry for hurting you and for breaking my promise but I can't be around you anymore, if I could then I would not have hurt you or leaving you feeling abandoned again especially since you still haven't got over the last person... who could not have had a good reason leave you. If thing were different then there is no way I would have broken my promise to you." His voice had been starting to crack a little with emotion showing that he was telling the truth, and when he had spoke about Edward he had sounded angry. But what did he mean if things were different.

"Is it because you don't think that I feel the same way as you, Is it because you don't think I love you?" I almost shouted through the phone at him. I had not meant to say that but I was just so confused and felt so lonely that I could not stand to hear him rejecting me. Jacob started talking again his voice guarded and obviously choosing his words very carefully.

"Bella what are you saying?"

"You heard me."

"Yes but I want to know what you meant by what you said"

"I...I..." I paused for a moment to think about what I had said and to think what to say in response when I gasped suddenly realising what is was that I had actually said. "Jacob I'm sorry you were not supposed to know. I didn't mean to say that. Oh god." I slid down the wall not able to think of anything smarter to get me out of the hole that I had started digging myself into. And I did the only thing that I could have done to make the situation worse. I started to cry. I tried my best to hide that fact from Jacob and to keep quiet but obviously Jacob had heard.

"Bella don't cry its ok don't cry why did you think you had to hide your feelings from me. You know how I feel about you, It's alright Bella everything is going to be ok."

"How Jacob? How is it going to be ok? ...and no I don't know how you feel about me I thought I did but I don't anymore."

"Bells I've got to go. Bye" and with that the phone line went dead.

"I just want you Jacob." I sobbed, to the phone I was holding into my hand.

"Guess things never went too well with Jacob then." Charlie had walked into the hall.

"What gave you that idea" I asked him as I ran upstairs.

After 10 minutes I became aware that Charlie was talking on the phone to somebody. And he seemed to be getting angry.

"What do you mean it's not your fault? My daughter is upstairs in tears after a conversation with you on the phone. I trusted you to look after her not to break her heart again just as it was starting to mend. You know what a mess she was in before and I can see her changing back that way in front of my eyes Jacob."...

"You had better make things right do you hear me or I will be holding you personally responsible." And with that I heard the phone being slammed down.


	2. Chapter 2

**Well this is the 2****nd**** chapter. Hope people are enjoying it so far. This chapter is a little shorter than I wanted it to be but it felt right to stop at that point.**

**I do not own either the twilight story or any of the characters.**

Chapter 2 - puzzles

Tap Tap Tap. I looked up from my pillow which had been covering my face whilst I got control of myself. Tap Tap Tap Tap Tap. Slowly I got up from my bed and walked over to my window. To my surprise I saw Jacob hanging from my windowsill. Instantly I wrenched the window open and grabbed Jacobs arm trying to pull him in.

"Bella let go I can get in on my own." I reluctantly let go and stepped away from the window, and Jacob jumped swiftly and silently into my room. I was shocked at how easily he seemed to make it look almost as if he did this on a daily basis. I realised that I was gawking at him when he looked at me funny. I quickly composed myself and ran up to him and gave him a massive hug. I had missed him. This must have surprised Jacob because it took him a couple of seconds before he started hugging me back. Then I leaned back in his arms before speaking to him I scrutinised his expression.

"Jake what are you doing here?" I whispered not wanting Charlie to hear.

"Bella I'm sorry I hurt you I really am, I came here to apologise properly, and if I can to make you feel better"

"So you'll tell me what's been going on and you'll talk to me again?"

"No...I...Bella I..." I must have caught him of guard I could see him trying desperately to think of answers. "Bells I can't tell you because I have had to promise not to tell anyone. Or at least it is like a promise but stronger, I have no choice. Bella please understand, it's dangerous for you to be around me. After tonight you cannot talk to me again and I have to stay away from you. Do you understand? I can't hang around with you again unless..." Jacob looked as if he had just discovered that he had a massive pile of gold buried under his house or something just as good. I had been trying to interrupt Jacob all through his speech but he had simply put his hang gently over my mouth so that I could not say a word until he had finished. He now took his hand away from my mouth and held both my shoulders so that he could look me directly in the eye. "Bella you have got to listen to me carefully and remember what I say. I cannot be around you unless you find out the truth. I cannot tell you the truth now but I have in the past before all of this happened, not long after you had moved to Forks. I know you may not remember the other legend that did not tell about vampires but you need to remember the story about my ancestors and who they were descendent of. Remember Bell's." With that he gave me a quick hug and was back out of my window before I had even registered what he had said.

Remember. I remembered the night at La Push that I assumed Jacob was talking about. We had gone off and walked down the beach on our own and he had told me some of the legends of his people. He had told me what Edward was, and he had told of the legend that his ancestors were decedents of animals. But what animal was it again? I thought through the story again and again all night until suddenly I remembered so quickly that I slapped my forehead for ever haven forgotten it. He had said his ancestors were decedents of wolves. That meant that Jacob might be a werewolf? But was he? Surly if Vampires were real then so were werewolves. I had to find out I looked at the time and realised how late it was, I vowed that tomorrow I would go and find Jacob straight after school.

What if it was true? What if Jacob was a werewolf? What would that mean for us? There were so many questions that I could hardly keep up. All that I knew for sure was that I had to talk to Jacob and find out. I needed to find out. But what if Jacob didn't talk to me? What if the people he had been with last night were there and stopped him from talking to me? I would just have to find a way of talking to him.

Until then I had to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Here is the next chapter. I appreciate the review's thank you.**

**S.M owns Twilight not me**

Chapter 3

That Day school seemed to last a lifetime. But finally the end of school came and I managed to get to my truck in record time. I also had the added bonus of avoiding the traffic that usually slowed students down as everyone tried to leave at the same time. As soon as I was out of school I headed straight to Jacobs place. As I pulled up outside his house I suddenly felt nervous. I had been so focused on what I think I had found out that I had not stopped to think how I was going to put my theories across to Jacob, or even if I was right, and what if Jacob was not alone. He never seemed to be alone anymore.

I worked up the courage to leave the safety of my truck and walked with purpose towards the door. As I approached the door it opened to show one of the boys Jacob had once hated so much. Paul I think his name was. He looked at me as if he was disgusted by me, and had no right to be there. I was not going to stand for that.

"What are you doing here, you're not allowed here anymore."

"Oh is that so, and what gives you the right to say that, it's not your home, it's Jacobs and it is him that I have come to see not you." I spat at him giving him my best glare.

"Is that so and does he know that you were coming over, because you know you two are not close anymore and it's rude to turn up uninvited unless you know the person well."

"Really why don't you let Jacob tell me that instead of you, unless there is something to hide like he has gone all hairy since the last time I saw him." With that comment Paul stiffened and that was the confirmation that I needed for my theory. Jacob was a werewolf and Paul knows about it.

"I don't think you should see Jacob at the moment he's been having a bit of trouble and needs some time on his own." It was a feeble attempt for trying to get rid of me and even I noticed how he had suddenly become al fidgety.

"Well if that was the case then why are you over here then, and if Jake is having trouble then I should be here even more to help him." I was not going to back down easily and Paul seemed to have realised this because he closed the door just enough so that I could not see through and turned to have a quiet word with someone who I could not see. After a couple of seconds he nodded and turned back round to face me.

"You're not going to give in are you?" it was a statement more than a question. When I shook my head he sighed and opened the door to let me in. When I walked into the room I saw Jacob glaring at a couple of other boys. Sam and Jared? Before he turned and gave me a big smile.

"Bella what are you doing here?" I looked pointedly at the others in the room; he seemed to get what I was getting at without me even saying anything. He walked over to the door of his room and held it open for me with an amused look on his face. I had to tell him in Private what I thought because I have no idea if the others in the room already knew like Paul or if they had been kept in the dark Just like me.

"Ok Jake Just tell me straight why did you not tell me you were a werewolf?" I had blurted this out as soon as Jacobs's bedroom door was closed, and by the look on Jakes face I knew I had got it right. For a moment I forgot that Jacob had given me the clue to figuring out what he was. "Did you not think I would figure it out?" I asked demanding an answer from him this time he sighed and whilst he spoke he wrote something down on a piece of paper for me to read.

"Bell's I couldn't tell you it was for your own good and besides who would hang around with a werewolf. I couldn't risk you rejecting me because of what I've become, so it seemed best not to give you the chance. So I tried to stop seeing you and not give you the chance of figuring things out." He pointed down at the piece of paper and I read

_I'm glad you figured it out, don't say anything to give it away that gave you a other's in the house are werewolf's as well and have very good hearing. They can hear everything that we are saying._

I recovered quickly from the shock of hearing I was in a house full of werewolf which I knew very little about. After all I had sort of expected them to know about Jacob being a werewolf.

"So what's going to happen now? Are you going to try and stop seeing me again... because you know I'll not let you do that, don't you?" Then after a little thinking I figured that the others would know about the Cullen's being vampires I said "Besides you should know me, and you should know that I wouldn't reject you because you were a werewolf. Come on Jake I've been hanging around with vampires up until recently a dog isn't going to scare me off very easily."

"A dog! I am not a dog." Jacob scoffed as he dived at me grinning cheekily. "Come on I want to introduce you to the others properly" Jacob took my hand and led me out of the room back to where the others were. They seemed to be convinced that I had figured this out on my own. But then I didn't really know them. "Guy's this is Bella, Bella these are Sam, Paul and Jared," They all looked up at me and nodded their heads in acknowledgement.

"Hi" I mumbled a little weirded out by the way they were all staring at me. Did I have something in my teeth, or had a bird caught my hair as it was flying past.

"Well Bella you've figured us out this is our pack; I think we might be able to trust you to keep our secret can't we?" It was Sam who was talking he sounded as if he was the boss going by the authoritive tone in his voice. I did not like how he seemed to be putting another meaning into the sentence. I felt as if he was saying if I told anyone then there would be trouble for me.


	4. Chapter 4 seeing the mith

**Thanx for the reviews and to all the people who have added my story to their favourite list or alerts, it really means a lot to me. So here is the next chapter**

**I do not own anything twilight related in this story**

Chapter 4

I was not particularly happy with Sam's implied meanings but decided not to push things otherwise it could get complicated for Jacob. Besides I wanted to find out more about werewolves.

"Of course I can keep your secret what do you take me for? Besides I don't want to cause bother for Jacob." The other's seemed to relax and Jacob gave me a hug. "Can we go for a walk" I asked Jacob

"Sure thing...but not the dogs kind of walk right?" I hit Jacobs arm playfully

"No not a dog walk, just a nice quiet walk to get some fresh air that's all" Jacob immediately started walking towards the door. "Jacob are you not going to put a jacket on its cold outside." All the boys stifled some laughing. "What?"

"Bella I don't need a jacket anymore I have a warmer body temperature than normal humans do I don't get cold."

"Oh"

"Come on "with that he took my hand and pulled me out of the door. We walked down to the beach holding hands then started walking the length of the beach.

"Jake?"

"Yeah?"

"What's it like being a werewolf?"

"It sometimes can be quite fun. I can run for hours without getting tired, I don't get cold anymore, I heal much quicker than I used to, I have an excellent sense of smell, and hearing, I am stronger and faster."

"It's only fun sometimes?" Jacob paused for a while before answering this question

"Ok Bella I'm not going to lie to you, most of the time it sucks, especially when I couldn't see you because of it."

"Jake that's different now; you can see me all the time if you want, now that I know... But that's not the only reason is it?" Jake sighed before answering this time.

"No it's not; if I lose my temper then I change. No matter if I want to or not, and it can be dangerous for anyone that is too close." He looked apologetically at me.

"Jake don't worry about me" When I said this I stood on tiptoe and kissed him gently. "I can look after myself, and I can't lose you, not so soon." Jacobs's response to this was to pull me to him and lean in and give me a more passionate kiss. For a moment we just stood there kissing, not taking any notice to anything that was going on around us. That was until a ball hurled out of nowhere and hit Jacob on the side of his head. The kiss broke and Jacob looked up shaking. When he realised he was shaking he quickly stepped back from me just before he changed.

Jacob actually changed form, his clothes ripped and within seconds he was standing in front of me as a very large wolf. As it turned out it was Paul who had thrown the ball, and at the sight of Jacob in his wolf form he quickly changed into his wolf form, and they both started to fight. I could not believe what I was seeing. At any moment Jacob could get badly hurt, and I did not know what to do to help him. I started to head in the direction of the fight, but before I had even taken two steps I found a pair of arms wrapped around my waist and carrying me in the opposite direction.

"Put me down I need to help him."

"Jake can handle himself Paul isn't any danger to him." It was Sam's voice who answered me and it was him who was taking me away from the fight. "Besides if you were to get any closer then it would most likely be you who got hurt not Jake. And you don't heal nearly as fast as us." With that reasoning I was stumped. I hadn't thought what I would do to stop the fight, but now I realised that I couldn't do anything that would not probably end up in me getting hurt. I stopped struggling, and Sam put me on the ground so that I could walk but still not trusting me still kept on hold of my wrist.

"Are you sure he won't get hurt?"

"Well he might get hurt but it would have fully healed in about half an hour." We had come to a tree that had fallen over which could serve as a seat. So I stopped walking and sat down on it.

"Bella I know it's a lot to take in at the moment but you should know that Jake thinks the world of you. He's always thinking about you. Drives the rest of us nut's." At the sight of my questioning face Sam went on to explain. "When we are in wolf form we can hear and see each other's thoughts, sometimes it is annoying, but it is also very useful for when we're working as a pack or when there is trouble."

"Oh right I see."

We sat in silence for a while until we heard some laughing coming from the direction where the fight was. Jacob and Paul came around the corner laughing. I instantly jumped up and ran towards the pair and practically jumped on to Jacob giving him a hug. He hugged me back then bent down and gave me a kiss.

"Sorry if I scared you."

"As long as you're ok, I'm happy." That was when I noticed some red lines on Jacob's chest and arms. They were fading away right before my eyes and I found myself watching them until they were completely gone. Now I understood what they meant by they could heal fast. They could hea so fast you can actually see them healing.

"I'm ok honest there is nothing there anymore." Jacob's whisper made me jump and I realised I had been staring at the place that the marks had once been, but was now smooth skin.

"You really do heal fast."


	5. Chapter 5

**Hi thank you so much for the reviews, here is the next chapter.**

**I own nothing Twilight related in this Story**

Chapter 5

It had been 3 months since I had discovered Jacob was a werewolf and had grown pretty used to seeing him or the other boys in his pack spontaneously changing into a wolf. Me and Jacob had been growing closer until we were practically inseparable apart from when we were at school. That was when I figured I wanted to get closer to Jacob and finally try to get Edward out of my mind.

We were at Jacob's alone his dad was out at the Clearwater's place with Sam it seemed that they had been having trouble with their Kid's Leah and Seth, who were both running high temperatures.

"Jake are you happy?"

"Of course I am"

"That's good" I snuggled up to him and gave him a kiss which grew more and more passionate the longer it went on. Before I know it we were ripping each other's clothes off. Our hands roaming the other person's body getting to know it more. Then Jake gently laid me on the bed still kissing and leaning over the top of me started rubbing his body against mine skin rubbing skin.

It had been sore but then Jacob had been gentle. He took things slowly at first and it didn't last long. But it was enough for me to not be a virgin any more. And it was enjoyable, if I ignored the slight discomfort.

We were lying in each other's arms when we heard the chatter outside the house. Oh no were going to get caught by Jake's dad. I jumped out of Jake's arms and hurriedly started gathering my clothes together and getting dressed. Jake in the meantime casually got up and simply put a pair of shorts on.

"Are you not going to put more than shorts on?" I asked him still trying to get dressed whilst he watched me.

"No point He'll just think that I have been in wolf form recently." I mentally slapped myself for forgetting that he could get away with that excuse. By then I was fully dressed again. I sat next to Jake and gave him a cuddle.

"That was brilliant I whispered into his ear." Giving it a little nibble at the same time. Jakes reply was to scoop me up onto his lap and kiss me gently on the forehead.

"I know he replied." We had to part after that as Charlie would be getting home soon and would be expecting something to eat.

When I parked my truck outside my house I noticed that there was an extra car outside the house that I was sure I recognised. I walked into the house, and started to cook some pasta. The pasta was nearly done before I got the feeling I was being watched. I turned around and felt the blood drain from my face. Now I knew that I had gone mad I thought I had got over him but obviously not as I was now imagining him in front of me. The time I had spent with Jacob hadn't made me forget him after all.

"Bella what's wrong, are you ok?" Edward walked over to me and put his arms around me looking concerned.

**Sorry it's a bit short but i felt this was the best place to end the chapter. **


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi thanks for the reviews they are much appreciated. So here is the next chapter**

**I do not own twilight**

Chapter 6

"I must be dreaming, I'm going crazy. Oh god, this is too much." I exclaimed as I tried to stop my imagination, tried desperately to get rid of this hallucination. Perhaps this was a weird after effect of sex which nobody ever spoke about. I heard a chuckle, and I looked up at the apparition who looked and felt so real. I saw amusement on his face but I also saw hurt in his eyes. Could apparitions have feelings?

"Bella I'm not a figment of you're imagination. I'm real, I'm here." Edward caressed my cheek and pulled me into a tighter hug. "No offences Bella but you smell." I had forgotten that vampire's didn't like the smell of werewolves and vice versa. Oh god what was I going to do. I was slowly starting to realise that Edward was real and here, which meant I had a choice to make. And not a very easy one, especially after tonight. I sighed.

"Do you mind if I finish cooking the pasta then go for a shower." Before he had the chance to reply I turned and saw the pasta was ready and took it off the heat. Taking the pasta over to the sink I strained the water out and added the sauce from a jar I had found at the back of the cupboard. Whilst I was doing this task I felt Edwards's eye's on me the whole time. Don't look at him, don't look at him, don't look at him. I had finished mixing the sauce and emptied the contents of the pan onto a plate and placed it into the microwave. Then I had no choice I had to look at him. I looked straight into his eyes and saw fear. FEAR. What was he scared about? "What's wrong?"

Edward studied me closely before replying carefully. "Was I wrong to come back?"

"what no you weren't wrong to come back, It's just you were away for so long that I was just starting to get used to the idea that you were never going to come back. At not whilst I still lived." Realisation shot thought his face, as he suddenly understood what I had said.

"So I was away for too long. You're angry at me for not coming back sooner."

"Yes. No. I don't know. It's just a lot for me to take in. I'm going for a shower." He seemed to realise that I needed some time to think and process things a little so he simply nodded in reply. I hurried to my room and gathered everything I would need, and hurried through to the bathroom. I thought the whole time I was in the shower. What should I do. What should I say. Who do I like the most. The answer to the last question was simple Edward. However the other two were a bit more difficult. Could I just dump Jacob? I didn't want to make him feel the same way that I had felt when Edward had dumped me. And what about tonight did having sex with Jacob really change anything.

Then I started thinking about Edward. Could I go back to him. I was just starting to cope again without him. Did I really want to give him the chance to hurt me again? Did he just expect me to go back to him whenever he felt like it, and wait for him to leave me again and for me to wait until he came back not even knowing for sure if he was going to come back. Oh I was so confused.

After another hour in the shower I had made a decision. I had worn out my time in the shower. The room was all steamy and humid. I realised that Edward probably was still waiting for me. With another sigh I got out of the shower and braced myself what was to come.

When I entered my room Edward was there waiting for me he had been pacing the length of my room, in agitation. I decided it was best to let Edward explain first. So I waited for him to start.

"Bella I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have left you, I was wrong I can see that now. I love you so much, I just wanted to protect you from all harm. Stupidly I thought that the best way I could do that was for me to leave you alone. Keep away from you and therefore keeping danger away from you. Attention would not be drawn to you from vampires for you being a mate of a vampire. But I was wrong I came back as soon as I realised that the harm was already done and that the best way to protect you was to physically keep them away from you if they ever came near to you. Please Bella Please will you forgive me for my idiocy." He looked at me after this speech with pleading eyes, and a look that almost looked like defeat. This made what I had decided a little harder. But it was the best thing to do. If anything then I wanted to keep at least a little of my pride.

"Edward I'm not going to lie to you. You leaving me here as if I was disposable just about killed me. If not physically then emotionally. If it hadn't been for Jake then I probably wouldn't even be here today talking to you." For a brief moment I reflected on a month after Edward had left when I had considered ending it all. That's when Jake had truly become a part of my life. He had convinced me that Jumping off of the cliff in the middle of a storm into the sea was a bad idea. Saying that if I did then he would have to jump in after me to save me. Looking back at Edward I saw him starting to close up. Mentally preparing himself for what was to come. "Look I'm not saying no I'm just saying give me a day to sort thing out again. I need a little bit of time to sort thing out in my mind and my life. I have to talk to some other people." I had to go and talk to Jacob how was I going to tell him? I had to find a way. But I had decided that I defiantly would not cheat on him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's chapter 7**

**I do not own Twilight or the characters**

Chapter 7

All night I had been tossing and turning thinking about recent event's why did everything good seem to happen at such inconvenient times. Normally I would have been over the moon finding out that Edward had come back to me, and finding out the reason behind why he had left me just made my heart ache. He did love me; he was just trying to protect me. But if it wasn't for the breath taking experience with Jacob then I wouldn't even have had a second thought about it. I glanced at my clock 5:30 another couple of hours and I could get up and visit Jacob. I had to tell him that Edward was back then I had to tell both of them who I had chosen. I just wish I had made the right decision. If only thing's were as plain as black and white. Not being able to lie in bed any longer, I got up and grabbed the book I was reading at the moment, deciding to read for a couple of hours.

By 9:15 I was in my truck outside the Black residence. Composing myself I got out of my truck and walked slowly towards the door. I reached up and knocked and waited. The door was opened by Jakes dad.

"Bella how nice to see you. Are you here to see Jacob?"

"Yeah is he awake yet?"

"He just got up before you arrived he's in the shower. Come on in he shouldn't be long." I walked into the living room where I sat on the couch to wait for Jacob. I had only been waiting a couple of minutes when Jacob came out of the bathroom, with his hair still dripping wet creating wet patches around his shoulders.

"Hey Bells what bring you here?" Jake's question was accompanied with a cheeky glint in his eyes as if he was communicating what he wanted to do. I gulped before replying to him

"Um Jake do you mind if we go for a walk so we can talk?" Jake's expression changed to show worry for a moment before he composed himself.

"Sure thing" he headed for the door holding it open for me as I passed. Oh god, hold it together Bella. You have to do this. I took a very deep breath.

"Jake Edward's back." I blurted. Oh great nice going that was not how I planned to say it. I wasn't sure how I was going to say it but that wasn't it. I glanced up at Jacob. He had frozen onto the spot; he seemed to be processing the news. It was a good 5 minutes' before he started to thaw.

"When?"

"Last night?"

"And you're only just telling me?"

"Jake I have had a lot of thinking to do. I have to go now but..." Jake cut me off.

"You're leaving now after telling me this you just go. Bella we need to talk about what were going to do." I noticed that Jake assumed that we were staying a couple, he had the belief that we had to stay together, but I still wasn't 100% sure I had made the right choice my heart said one and my head said the other.

"Yes Jake I have to go but if you could, I would appreciate it if you could meet me at the swing park at 10:30." That gave me just under an hour to tell Edward to meet me there at the same time, and for me to compose myself before making my decision final. I also needed for us to meet somewhere neutral, as I had no idea how either of them would take my news. I tuned on my heel and walked over to my truck leaving Jacob to think about what I had told him.

This time when I was in my truck composing myself I was outside the Cullen residence. I got out of my truck again and walked slowly to the door, however the only difference this time was that the door opened, and Edward stood there to greet me. He held an apprehensive and scared. I realised that he was worried that I wasn't going to go back to him. I had to explain everything before he found out from Jacob's thoughts and lost control.

"Have you finished thinking then?" he seemed worried about the answer

"Yes I have, but before I tell you what I have decided you need to know what has been happening to me since for the past 7 months. So that you understand." Once I had said this he stepped aside and let me in he walked up to his room, his eye's never leaving me. For a second I thought he doesn't want to let me out of his sight again. But I quickly got rid of that thought as I reasoned that he was just worried that I would fall and break my ankle or something. Once we entered his room I immediately noticed one major change he had already made. He had bought a bed. Why did he need a bed he didn't sleep? We both sat down on his couch and I braced myself sitting up straight and putting my shoulders back. I began.

"When you left me I was an emotional wreck. I was so bad that Charlie had tried to send me to stay with my mum again; he seemed to think that some sun would cheer me up. I was so miserable that my friends had all given up trying to get a conversation out of me. I was like a zombie I did everything that I was supposed to but on automatic pilot." I paused seeing the pained expression on his face. "I'm only telling you this because you need to know, to understand. It was only when Jacob Black came along that I started to feel again. He made me forget about the pain for a while he made me smile and feel happy again. He also understood that I was hurting; he was there for me whenever I needed to talk, and he was there to make me laugh again after another nightmare. I started being able to have a conversation with friends at school again. Then he made me a promise that he wouldn't hurt me. But he broke it." I paused seeing the anger in Edwards's eyes. I hastily continued. "It wasn't his fault but I felt as if I had been abandoned again, as if he had ripped open some wounds that had started to heal and made them worse. But then I found out the truth. The reason why he wasn't talking to me and avoiding me all of the time. He was a werewolf and he was trying to protect me from himself. Of course when I found out I wouldn't let him use that as an excuse." I looked at Edward then and saw that he understood what I meant after all I had done the same thing when I found out that he was a vampire. "well since then we have kind of been a couple..." up until now my voice had more confidence than the person using it had, but I hesitated in telling Edward the next part, but I knew that I had to otherwise it would be worse for him if Jacob decided to think about it.

"Go on, I won't get angry or anything. Just tell me." He encouraged me so I took another deep breath.

"Last night is the reason why I had to think about what I should do when I found you had come back." I paused and he gave me a look of encouragement. "Last night I lost my virginity to him."


End file.
